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You are here: Home >> Articles >> Are you a victim of dating violence?

September, 2004

In her book In Love and in Danger: A Teen's Guide to Breaking Free of Abusive Relationships, Barrie Levy writes:

Many victims don't recognize that they are being abused.  They don't realize how they have gradually changed because of the abuse.  Are you a victim of dating violence?  Answer the questions below.  If you answer yes to two or more of them, you are in an abusive relationship, or your relationship is likely to become abusive.

Are you frightened of your boyfriend or girlfriend's temper?

Are you afraid to disagree with him or her?

Do you find yourself apologizing to yourself or others for your boyfriend or girlfriend's behavior when you are treated badly?

Have you been frightened by his or her violence towards others?

Have you been hit, kicked, shoved, or had things thrown at you?

Do you not see friends or family because of his or her jealousy?

Have you been forced to have sex?

Have you been afraid to say no to sex?

Are you forced to justify everything you do, every place you go and every person you see to avoid his or her temper?

Have you been wrongly and repeatedly accused of flirting or having sex with others?

Are you unable to go out, get a job or go to school without his or her permission?

Have you become secretive, ashamed or hostile to your parents because of this relationship?

Excerpted from In Love and in Danger: A Teen's Guide to Breaking Free of Abusive Relationships (c) 1998 by Barrie Levy.  All rights reserved.

See also:
Some of the ways teens have been abused
Straight Talk For Girls
Are you an abuser?
Myths about women and dating
Four Building Blocks In Understanding Teen Dating Violence
The Mathematics of Battering
Qualities of a healthy relationship

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