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You are here: Home >> Resources >> Handouts >> Could You Just Listen

September, 2004

Could You Just Listen

When I ask you to listen to me and you start giving me advice, you have not done what I asked.

When I ask you to listen to me and you begin to tell me why I shouldn't feel that way, you are trampling on my feelings.

When I ask you to listen to me and you feel you have to do something to solve my problems, you have failed me, strange as that may seem.

Listen - All I asked was that you listen, not talk or do -- just hear me.

When you do something for me that I can and need to do for myself, you contribute to my fear and inadequacy.

But when you accept, as a simple fact, that I do feel what I feel, no matter how irrational, then I can quit trying to convince you and get about this business of understanding what's behind my feeling.

So please listen and just hear me.

And if you want to talk, wait a minute for your turn---and I'll listen to you.

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