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You are here: Home >> Resources >> Handouts >> The Mathematics of Battering

September, 2004

Taking
Control
+ Unfair
Expectations
+ Not Taking
Girls & Women
Seriously 
= Battering

Taking control means:

Giving orders Being the boss Making decisions for the two of you without consulting the other person Being possessive, keeping track of where the other person is, who they talk to and what they do Criticizing her all the time Ruining her reputation by spreading rumors Getting her back for not doing what you want

Unfair expectations are:

Thinking she owes you sex Believing she must agree with you all the time Thinking  she shouldn't contradict you in public You can question her but she can't question you She must be interested in everything you are interested in Thinking you don't need to be interested in what she's interested in Expecting her to be available all the time Expecting her to put up with any mood you're in When you are unhappy, expecting her to feel responsible for making you feel better Thinking that you can cheat on her but she can't cheat on you

Not taking girls and women seriously means:

Not listening Not respecting their opinions Seeing girls as sex objects Thinking girls aren't as smart as boys Thinking girls are too sensitive, overly emotional, or irrational Sexism

Battering includes:

Hitting, shoving, pinching, burning, pushing, beating, throwing things, punching walls Threatening to hurt someone Destroying a person's property, hurting their pets, threatening their family Forcing sex on another person Keeping someone fearful of you

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