In her book In Love and in Danger: A Teen’s Guide to Breaking Free of Abusive Relationships, Barrie Levy writes:
If you are emotionally or verbally abusive, you may believe that you are also a victim. You may believe that others cause your problems, and cause your violence. The result is that you don’t recognize that you have a problem that only you can change. Answer the questions below. If you answer yes to two or more of these, then you are an abuser.
| Are you extremely jealous and possessive? | |
| Do you have an explosive temper? | |
| Do you constantly ridicule, criticize or insult your girlfriend or boyfriend? | |
| Do you become violent when you drink and/or use drugs? | |
| Have you broken their things or thrown things at them? | |
| Have you hit, pushed, kicked or otherwise injured them when you were angry? | |
| Have you threatened to hurt or kill them or someone close to them? | |
| Have you forced them to have sex, or intimidated them so they are afraid to say no? | |
| Have you threatened to kill yourself if they leave? | |
| Do you make them account to you for every moment they are away from you? | |
| Do you spy on them or call them constantly to check up on them? | |
| Do you accuse them of seeing other guys or girls? |
Excerpted from In Love and in Danger: A Teen’s Guide to Breaking Free of Abusive Relationships (c) 1998 by Barrie Levy. All rights reserved.