This “Contract” is to help you know better what you want in your close relationships. Two people in a relationship can use this contract to understand what each person wants and where they disagree. Write your answers down and, if you want to, compare answers with your friends or your boyfriend or girlfriend.


  1. Should every weekend and evening be spend with your girl/boyfriend?

  2. Who decides what to do and where to go on a date?

  3. What about expenses? Should the boy be expected always to pay?

  4. If your date always pays for expenses, are you obligated to go along with his or her sexual advances?

  5. How much do you want you or your date to use alcohol or other drugs?

  6. Is there any situation in which it would be okay for your date to push you around? To hit you?

Sexual rights

  1. Is either person free to say that they do or don’t want to go any further sexually?

    At what point may a person refuse to have sex?

  2. If both you and a person of the opposite sex agree to have intercourse, whose responsibility is it to use birth control? To protect against AIDS?

Other relationships

  1. Are you or your boy/girlfriend free to make friendships with other people? If so, how will you deal with jealousy?

  2. Is it alright for you or your girl/boyfriend to make friends with those of the opposite sex?

  3. Do you include each other in those relationships?


  1. What qualities are the most important to you in a boy/girlfriend?

  2. What do you consider the most important ingredients in a relationship?